But you have three jobs and hardly sleep! You do enough. No. I don't. This is routine to me, and you can't mistake habit for hard work. I also been teaching myself to spend my time working and working out smarter and more efficiently. I'm taking on more REAL responsibility and challenging myself to be more disciplined. I don't watch porn anymore, I don't, masturbate and I don't drink. All things I enjoyed doing at some point or another. I did stop drinking last year though so I could learn to deal with my problems better which lead to a lot of...emotional outbursts. I became a little unhinged but then I healed, properly and for real which has given me much clarity. Why mention this? I feel like this new information I have access to, research, continue to learn and read about was something I wouldn't have accepted because I might not have been ready. It challenged my upbringing and my belief system but I was ready for the harsh reality.
It's looking like the struggle I have chosen is the path to success despite loneliness. Men are kind of screw over here in the West due to the current dating market. I have no issues getting casual sex but I am not only tired of these frequent hookups, I know the long term dangers it has. I'm thinking long term these days. I am not looking for short term happiness or instant gratification. I mean I have been doing that for years and I have nothing to show for it. I valued sex way too much because my life was not fulfilled. I didn't pursue something more important that sex when I should have been. I got too much self worth self value by my ability to pull women. But I also know how much of this was my own fault for becoming weak in so many ways. Afraid of the truth and that's not me. I am not a coward and I never have been.
I learned everything that was and is wrong with me and I am working tirelessly to fix all those things and expel all the weakness in my being. All things considered, this has all been very fun and I am enjoying my self improvement journey and I hope to enlighten and bring as many like minded people to the correct side of life. To be the best version of yourself, truthful, fulfilled, intelligent and wealthy. I'll do another update in four months. To everyone that read this much I urge you to really think long term about the things you are doing or believe in and ask if these things lead to a great, happy life. Take care.